Do You Know What Day It Is?

Yesterday was Square Root Day. My local news actually covered this. I'm not sure why because most of the time we don't hear anything about all the ridiculous daily observances. Take today, March 4, for example. To me, the observances for today are far more entertaining than square roots. (Of course, so is just about everything.)

For example, today is "Benjamin Harrison Day." President Harrison, in addition to sporting a fine-looking beard, was a man ahead of his time. During his Presidency, electricity was first installed in the White House. Harrison was terrified of being electrocuted and wouldn't touch a light switch, so he often slept with the lights on. Good thing his wife was a hottie.

Today is also "Courageous Follower Day." I'm not positive about what that means since it would seem more courageous to lead than to follow, but whatever. Maybe they're talking about the followers of this guy. I guess they were courageous. Or stupid. It's a matter of perspective really.

And it's also "International Scrapbooking Industry Day." A day on which thousands of stay-at-home moms attend "parties" at the homes of other stay-at-home-moms. They bring photos and drink wine coolers. They laugh. They gossip. They purchase overpriced stickers and stencils. They craft witty captions. All so they can make less serious scrapbookers feel guilty about the lame job they're doing chronicling their child's early years and/or that family vacation to Carlsbad Caverns.

Now for something serious: It's "National Grammar Day." There will be no jokes made here. Grammar is not a joking matter. If you would like to make a grammar joke, I suggest you visit a different blog. Also, I strongly advise you to avoid Courtney Love's blog, where you will find things like this:

"ive been nbot working the tightest program and been multi tasking and managing time horribly- so i was on the phone and i said i wanted pretty short bangs- not NO bangs and she cut them when i was on the phone with one of these whakcjob banks that heres some trust and some joint bogus account and some insane mortage in- these f***s for years and years and years=- in anycase anyone know exactly how many records Nirvana has sold all in worldwide since Nirvana started?"

Finally, it is "Learn What Your Name Means Day." I was pretty sure my name meant "Perspires Awesomeness," but I wanted confirmation. I went to this site and searched all three of my names. Paul comes from the Roman family name Paulus which means "small" or "humble." Michael's origin is Hebrew and means "Who is like God?" And Murphy means "sea warrior."

So pretty much like I thought.

That 'humble' thing is obviously meant to be sarcastic.