Thursday, February 25, 2010

Once Again, I am Awarded for my Brilliance

Regular readers of this blog know that I do not look upon blog awards with the kind of scorn which has become de rigueur.* I revel in them. I bask in their self-esteem enhancing glow. I wring their generous teats until I collect every sweet drop of approbation in my bottomless bucket.

But you also know that I believe GUIDELINES ARE FOR THE UNCREATIVE.

So although I appreciate Sarah Dooley and Kelly Polark contributing to my unjustifiably high ego, I will not be posting an image of the award on this blog.
And I will not be posting the rules for the award.
And I will not be passing this award on.
And I will not be following the rules, either. The quote-unquote guidelines say I am to give you six lies and a truth and you are to guess the truth. While I could, with relative ease, contrive six exceedingly imaginative lies (I'm an award winning blogger, after all), I prefer, today, to tell the truth. What follows, therefore, are six truths and one lie. I look forward to your guesses and, although it no doubt goes without saying, your slack-jawed veneration.

1. While whitewater rafting, I once heroically pulled my wife from the rushing rapids seconds before she slammed into a wall of rock.

2. A doctor once gave me a prostate exam by mistake.

3. I once hit an antelope while driving through a nature preserve in Nevada. My car was towed to the town of Winnemucca by a driver named Wiley. Like the coyote.**

4. When I was a kid I won the local free throw shooting competition three years in a row.

5. I live less than three miles from an Extreme Makeover Home Edition house.

6. The Wife and I were in New Orleans ten days before Hurricane Katrina hit. We ate beignets, toured Jackson Square, and got lost.

7. My family hosted an exchange student from Stoke-on-Trent, England, when I was in high school.


* Like most of the tools I own, foreign phrases are fun to use, even if I'm not entirely sure how to use them.
** Actually, most likely not. The coyote spells his funny.


Amy Allgeyer Cook said...

I have no idea which one is the lie, though I'm hoping #2. Heh heh...#2.

Jonathon Arntson said...


Kelly said...

Hmmm, you live quite the adventurous life apparently, but my guess is number one.

Tracy Edward Wymer said...


elizabeth said...

Hmmm, nobody has guessed #6 yet, so I'll go with that. :-)

I live about 3 miles from a makeover house myself.

Rena said...

LOL @ all your conditions. Everyone loves a rebel. I don't know you well enough to have a clue, so I'll guess #4 on a whim.

Anita said...

I've never heard you make any England jokes, so I'm going with that one. Can't wait to hear the prostrate story...and I'm wondering if the saving of The Wife description is exaggerated???

Jonathon Arntson said...

My number symbol is supposed to be a 7.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe you're making us wait this long. Over at anitalaydonmiller, she told us first thing in the morning.

Anita said...

Yeah, actually, that was me.

Paul Michael Murphy said...

Elizabeth wins. I have done all of those things in New Orleans, but it was a few years before Katrina, not ten days.

Ray Veen said...

Oh good. I get to be the first person to post after you give the answer. You must not want to hear my guess.

(It was the freethrow one. Which means I doubted your athletic prowess.)