Sunday, September 6, 2009

What Took So Long?

Although Charles H. Duell never actually said, "Everything that can be invented has been invented," it would be a lot cooler if he had. Because then I could use the above quote to introduce yet another product that has me asking, "Why didn't I (or someone even smarter) think of that?"

Following in the same tradition as chips clips, omelet makers, and these things, some enterprising lass has invented the GoGirl, a female urination device that allows its user to pee while standing up.

I'm not real knowledgeable about prehistory, but I think it's safe to say that women have been squatting to pee for a really long time. I think it's also fair to say that it's been a bit of an inconvenience.* The GoGirl doesn't appear to be all that complicated. So of the many questions I have, the most mind-boggling is Just what the hell took so long?

By the way, the GoGirl website is a gift that keeps giving. My favorite part is the page titled "Who Needs It?"

The "Globalgirl," for one. When you travel, you never know what you'll find. Especially when it comes to bathrooms. You might find anything from a hole in the ground to no sanitary facilities at all. [blogger's note: doesn't that imply that holes in the ground are sanitary? Hmm.] With GoGirl, the world is your toilet.

Well there's a slogan I can get behind.

"OutdoorsyGirl:" Why bother squatting and the usual contortions? With GoGirl, there's no messing up your jeans or dripping down your leg.

As someone who has peed standing up for a number of years, I can tell you that that's not necessarily true.

And this gem, which I'm sure the people of India appreciate: Whether you're taking off for India, taking on nature, taking on the competition, or just taking on the challenges of everyday life, there are plenty of reason to love GoGirl.

I've never been to India, and now, I'm not sure I ever will.

They're selling 40,000 of these things per week. I'd say something about penis envy, but that would probably go over like pee stains on a toilet rim.

Want to see more?


*At least according to the Wife and some anecdotal evidence I've picked up over the years. And the really long women's restroom lines at sporting events. And my own experience. Sometimes it's just safer to sit.


Sarah said...

Ohhhh... I want one. At least while I'm here... and pregnant. Although, as far as outdoors go, I think the lawn john is by far superior. My husband took a lawn chair, cut out the bottom and added a toilet seat. Not his invention, but certainly enjoyable... for both genders.

MG Higgins said...

Okay, so I've used my "GoGirl" and now I'm left holding (wearing?) a device I've peed on/in. What do I do with it? Carry it, dripping urine, to the sink and wash it out? What if I'm in "India" and there's no running water? Do I simply shake it out and stick it in my purse or backpack? I'm sure the website explains all, but, honestly, I don't want to "go" there.

Paul Michael Murphy said...

Yes, there are many unanswered questions.

Paul Michael Murphy said...

And Sarah, your husband is a genius. He needs to get a web site up and running and make a sweet YouTube commercial. I suggest he market it to tailgaters. I could have used one on Saturday.

Monica said...

awesome, PMM. Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

Sarah Dooley said...

My boyfriend, who is transgendered and has to be creative in a number of ways, reports that the GoGirl is the most functional of "female" urination devices, but that it still leaves much to be desired.

That's not TMI, right?

Paul Michael Murphy said...

I'm not sure if there is such a thing as TMI on this blog.

Mary Witzl said...

I had to come see this. I want one too. In fact, I want four: one for me, and three for my daughters.

I once took a train journey from Oaxaca to Mexicali. The toilets did not flush and the ammonia fumes got so bad, they had to close them down altogether. The men just did what they had to do between the cars, but the women just held it. The next year, I traveled the same route in a bus that had no toilet. The driver stopped periodically to let all the men out to pee; all the women just sat there stoically. Mexican women who travel must have bladders as big as watermelons. I don't buy the whole penis envy thing, but on that trip, I suffered from it badly.

FYI, I'm guessing here is how you use it: after use you give it a good shake like -- well, you know. You then place it in a plastic bag in which you have enclosed a good supply of 'wet ones', to wash your hands with. When you get to your destination, you wash the device out in the hotel sink.

This is the sort of thing that sounds hilarious until you're traveling in a place with no toilets, or toilets that are rickety and see through, or teeming with roundworms and swarming with flies (really). Then, believe me -- it's a Godsend.

MG Higgins said...

Based on Mary's experience and description of how it might be used, I have totally changed my opinion and will buy a GoGirl before my next foreign adventure. My rating of this post has switched from "somewhat gross" to "quite helpful."

Kelly said...

My best friend could have used one of these many times after the bars in our college days.

Jason said...

I do not know if any of you have seen this before, but your post reminded me of it. The Stadum Buddy

Monica said...

we call those 'texas catheters' in the nursing biz/.

Anita said...

I have no problem peeing on the side of the road.

Big Plain V said...

I almost bought one for my wife so that she can enjoy the singular joy of peeing on a campfire.

Amber Lough said...

I have to chime in on this. I have a college story... (isn't that a loaded phrase)

I bought this contraption when I was in college that looked like one of those spoons you put medicine in for young children, but larger, with a hole at the end. It was essentially a plastic peeing penis. The first time I tried using it, it leaked and soaked my jeans. And I was at my boyfriend's mother's house.

I tried again later, in the shower, but just never got the hang of it. Ever since, I've been perfectly fine peeing in the dirt if the need arises.

Amber Lough said...

Ok, now I just watched the video and I've changed my mind. I want one.